I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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