he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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