you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Randomize