Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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