I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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