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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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