if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize