Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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