State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize