I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
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Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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