WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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