please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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