so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
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Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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