I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize