if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
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I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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