this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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