Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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