it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
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