Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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