He uses pillows to masturbate.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize