There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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