You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize