Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize