WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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