So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I am available for nakedness
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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