are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize