what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
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also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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