dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize