im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
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