hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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