We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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