remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
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She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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