he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize