I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize