We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
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