it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
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