maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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