people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
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