i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize