Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
ok first of all what the fuck
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