I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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