Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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