Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize