If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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