Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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