Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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