No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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