Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting married
To pizza
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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