i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
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Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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