You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize